Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Time To Donate

First of all, I had my blood tested yesterday. The blood levels (red blood cells, white blood cells, platelets and hemoglobins) are all good. The Dr. felt my abdomen (where the tumors were) and said it felt fine. He said he is very happy with my progress. Now we just wait for the tumor markers, which I should get back today or tomorrow. As for the CT scan, that is scheduled for next Wednesday.

Now, for the donation pitch.

In March, Marisa Allen (Josh's sister), has organized "Tucson Climb to Conquer Cancer". This is a climb to raise money for the American Cancer Society, and will be doing so in memory of Josh.

Roni and I are planning on attending this climb and will be heading to AZ for the event and a few days of relaxing and sightseeing.

So how can you help? Roni and I have registered for the climb, and we both have web pages where you can make a donation.

To make a donation via Kevin's page, click here.

To make a donation via Roni's page, click here.

You can also make a general donation to the event at this page.

We both have set the same goals for donations, but hope to exceed those. So anything you can give would make this climb a success and would be greatly appreciated.

Thanking you in advance for your generosity.

Kevin

Monday, January 03, 2005

Update on Josh

As some of you may remember, one of our fellow cancer fighters passed away last year. His name was Josh Allen and he was diagnosed with the same cancer that I had. Needless to say, we were all shocked. If you had put the two of us side by side and asked which one would likely survive, you would have guessed Josh.

Well, as it turns out, he did NOT have the same type of cancer I did. His family had an autopsy done and discovered that his type of cancer was linitas plastica. From what I understand, the type of cancer cells are similar, but his originated in the stomach instead of the appendix (like mine did). This type of cancer is very fatal and it turns out that he lived much longer than he should have. Just another testament to the fight he gave.

You can read more about his updated diagnosis on his sister's blog.

Please continue to keep his family in your prayers.

Sunday, January 02, 2005

Catching Up

OK, it's been awhile since I've posted. I have no excuse. So here is a post to catch everyone up-to-date.

Vacation
In December, Roni and I travelled to Oregon to spend time with my family. Apart from the long flights in cramped seats, we had a great time. It was the first time in about 10 years that my entire family had been together. And it was the first time that some of my family had seen me since my medical problems started. It was good seeing everyone again and we look forward to the next time we can all get together.

Back to the Gym
Six months after my last surgery, I have finally made it back to the gym. You would think it would be easy as the gym is on the first floor of our apt building. But for one reason or another, I didn't go. Today I went. It was a short and easy workout (relatively speaking), but it wore me out. I am hoping to get back into a routine and hopefully get back into shape soon.

New Medicine
Since I have still been having problems with my digestive system, I was prescribed a new medicine to try. It is Tincture of Opium (opium the drug, not the perfume) and is supposd to help heal the lining of the intestines and "slow things down". I have been on it for about 2 and a half weeks and I am sorry to say I have not seen a vast improvement. Hopefully soon.

I was also told that things should be getting better about 6 months after my surgery, which is coming up soon. So maybe with that, and the medicine, and going back to the gym, I will start improving soon.

Happy New Year!
We hope that everyone has a great new year. May it be a year filled with good health and no hospitals.

New Test Soon
This week, I need to make an appointment for my next round of tests. I will be having another blood tumor test and a CT Scan. These are the types of tests that cause trepidation as we wait for the results. As you may remember, the last blood test were good so we are praying that this next one will be as well. As for the CT Scan, this will be the first one since my surgery.

I hate these tests because until you get the "all clear" you alway wonder and/or worry about something showing up that shouldn't. Plus, I hate barrium. :-(

Well, that's it for now. I'll try to post as soon as we get the test results back.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

WHOO HOO!!

Finally got some good news.

As you may remember from last week's episode, alright, the episode from a couple of days ago, I had my blood taken for tumor marker tests. Well, I got the results back today and everything is normal. I was kind of expecting they would be, but it's always a relief to actually get the news. For those who are interested, here they are:

CEA -> 2.3 (range is between 0.0 and 2.5)
CA 19-9 -> 12 (range is between 0 and 37)

I'll look up the results of past tests so you can see the differenes of before my surgery and after. I'll post them here on the blog and let you know when they are up.

For those who have to have this done regularly, you know what it is like waiting to hear the results. For those who have never had to go through this, just imagine every three months or so, waiting to find out if you have cancer again or not.

For now, I am off the hook for another 3 months, when I will get another tumor marker test and a CT scan.

Oh, and for those who were wondering, my bilirubin total was 0.85. (No, I don't know what that is, but it must be important or they wouldn't have tested for it. Right?)

Well, that's all the news that's fit to print. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

How I'm Doing

So, you're probably wondering how I've been faring. Well, I'll tell ya.

My intestines are still healing After a couple of months after the surgery I was beginning to worry that things weren't going to get any better. I went to see my oncologist, who took blood tests and felt for tumors. The blood tests all came back normal and he said he couldn't feel anything. So that was good to hear. I also called Dr. Sugarbaker's office to find out from them if what I was experiencing was normal. What I was told is that what I was going through was normal. I also received an email from a guy that went through something similar and he said it took about 6 months before everything started working again.

The good news is, there is a good chance everything will start working again. The bad news, it might take another 3 months or so. So, I just have to wait it out.

On another note, I went back to my oncologist again for another blood test. This was for tumor markers, which I have to get every three months. This is the first tumor marker test since my last surgery, so here's praying everything is normla.

A NEW FEATURE: You might notice a new feature on the right hand column. I now have a guest book that you are free to leave a message in. Also, don't forget that you can also leave a comment on any particular post.

Well, that is it for now. When I get the news back from the tumor marker test, I'll post again.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

In Memory...

On Sunday morning, at 10:20 AM, Josh Allen finished his battle with cancer. He fought courageously with all that he had. He fought for his family. He fought for his friends. He fought for himself. But now his fight is over. Now he finally gets to rest. Cancer free.

On Sept 16th, 2004, Josh went to the hospital again because he had difficulty breathing. When they did some tests, it turned out he had fluid surrounding his lungs and he was put on a ventilator. They drained the fluid and the pathology report came back saying it was cancer. Josh spent the next 10 days in the hospital.

On Sat, Sept 25th, I received a phone call from Marisa (Josh’s sister) asking for prayer and telling us that the doctors did not expect Josh to make it past the weekend. I immediately sent out a prayer request to all of my family and friends. The next day we got the news that Josh passed away.

Josh was diagnosed with mucinous adenocarcinoma of the appendix (the same diagnosis I have) in Jan of this year. It is obvious now that his cancer was much more advanced than mine and probably more aggressive. Although he never had the “Mother Of All Surgeries”, he endured countless trips to the hospital, spent more time in ICU than I ever did, went through more rounds of chemo than I did and suffered with an NG tube longer than I did. And through all that time, he kept plugging away. Never giving up. He was a strong man and a valiant warrior when it came to fighting cancer.

But some warriors die. And when they do, they are remembered by those left behind. There is a tradition among soldiers to toast fallen comrades, and so, in that spirit, I would ask you to raise a glass, a bottle, or a cup of your favorite beverage…

To fallen comrades.

To Josh.

May his life and fight be an example to others. May his memory be a blessing to all.

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Yom Kippur

This is Roni writing. I haven't posted in a while, but it's early in the a.m., and I can't sleep. It's been quite a day, and I have so much on my mind and in my heart.

Yesterday was Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement for the Jewish people. It's a somber, contemplative holiday in which we fast, examine ourselves, repent and ask for forgiveness. It's also a day when we remember the loved ones we have lost.

There is an afternoon service called Yizkor during which congregants pray silently from the prayer book to remember our loved ones who are no longer with us. There are separate prayers for those who have lost children, parents, spouses...

I can't even tell you the emotions that came over me as I turned past the page containing the prayer for those who have lost a husband. It was on Oct. 8, two days after Yom Kippur last year (Jewish calendar is lunar), that Kevin went to the emergency room and we discovered he was sick. It was on Oct. 9, 2003 that I almost lost him (the first close call of others to follow) when he went in for emergency surgery. The fact that today I did not observe the Yizkor service as a widow is the culmination of so many miracles, so many answered prayers. It's wonderful. It's humbling. It's amazing and mystifying. It's the greatest joy, and it is sobering.

Only a few short hours before yesterday's Yizkor service, Kevin received a call on his cell phone to ask for prayer for fellow appendix cancer fighter, Josh. Doctors don't expect him to make it through the weekend. (That just means doctors are at the end of their resources; G-d is not at the end of His.) Even as I felt such gratitude for having Kevin at my side in the service, my heart went out to Gretchen and the whole Allen family. (I'm so grateful to our whole synagogue who prayed for them at the service yesterday!)

Many prayers went up from me today for Josh's healing, and for strength and peace for the family. I thought of people on our internet support group--Frank who recently lost his wife, Kat who joyfully had her husband restored to her, Steph & Jesse who daily, and heroically, struggle with this disease, Nancy who is home with her small children while her husband is away in a hospital recovering from surgery and awaiting another procedure, others whom we haven't heard from in a while, for whom we hope and pray the best. Friends who are dealing with other kinds of health issues or financial loss or broken relationships. All people who are too young, or too good--usually both--to have disease, pain, loss, fear, stress, disability... invade their lives so violently. It would seem there is no exemption card.

But Yom Kippur is also a day for remembering that G-d is a G-d of redemption, mercy and lovingkindness, even though we fall so short of being the people we should be. For us, as Messianic Jews, we also remember the suffering of the Messiah Yeshua (the suffering Messiah is spoken of in the Talmud, Sukkah 52a as well as in the Scriptures--e.g. Isaiah 53). He suffered and died to be our atonement. But He also was raised from the dead to be our redeemer--our rescuer from the fate of a life here on earth, as well as in eternity, separated from G-d's love, strength, courage, grace... all the things we need to face a life that can feel so harsh and cruel, especially when bad things do happen to good people. To any people. To any of G-d's creation.

There is a lot I don't know or understand. But I know one thing. If I had had to say the widow's prayer yesterday, somehow, G-d would have imparted to me enough faith, truth and comfort to enable me to go on and say--through tears of pain and loss to be sure--the Kaddish (the mourner's prayer). This beautiful prayer acknowledges that despite pain and sorrow, G-d is worthy to be praised. It acknowledges the need for mourning, the period of deep grieiving and the sorrow that never fully disipates, but it also employs the discipline of praising G-d in the midst of pain to help mourners to move into acceptance without becomming bitter. A portion:

"Glorified and celebrated, lauded and praised, acclaimed and honored, extolled and exalted may the Holy One be, fay beyond all song and psalm, beyond all tributes which man can utter. And let us say: Amen.

"Let there be abundant peace from heaven, with life's goodness for us and for all the people Israel. [And for all people of faith, integrity and seekers of truth who struggle with hard realities. For all in the PMPbellybuttons support group, for my fellow congregants, my family and friends everywhere].

"And let us say: Amen."

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Why do bad things happen to good people?

I think it is true for every cancer patient to think, “Why did this happen to me?” I know I did. Why couldn’t Osama binLaden get cancer and die in some cave in Afghanistan? Why did G-d allow me to get cancer and not some scumbag terrorist?

I don’t have an answer to that. The best thing I can come up with is, it just is. We live in an imperfect world, and sometimes you get hit in the noggin with a curve ball.

I remember lying in my hospital bed, in Oct of 2003. The surgeon that performed the emergency operation on me was to stop by in the morning and give us the result of the pathology report. Roni hadn’t arrived yet. At first I kept praying for good news. Over and over again, I would pray, “G-d, please let it not be serious.” Then for some reason my prayer changed. I then started praying, “G-d, please give us the strength to face whatever happens.”

A short time later, after Roni had arrived, the surgeon stopped by and told us, “It’s malignant.” I believe my prayer helped me to be ready for that.

It is now almost a year later. I have been through 3 operations, two of which included chemo. I have been through 4 rounds of chemo (both oral and infusion). I have spent a total of 6 weeks in hospital and about 9 at home recovering. I have had to deal with an ostomy, and then the effects of having it reversed. I’ve been through a lot, but others have been through much worse.

My wife and I have spent hours praying for healing, and G-d has answered our prayer. Then I think, why did He answer our prayer and not the prayers of others? I don’t know. Maybe He did, but not with the answer they wanted. Maybe there are lessons we need to learn from going through all this pain and suffering. Maybe in the long run, it will make us better people, and will make it possible for us to help others through their times of trouble.

At least that is what my prayer is now.

Friday, September 03, 2004

Arizona

Well, I arrived home from my trip to Arizona yesterday. The conference I went to was good, the only problem was that my digestive system was still giving me a hard time. Hopefully things will start to settle down soon. :-(

It was hot in Arizona, over 100 degrees farenheight every day. But it was still great. The resort was beautiful and the scenery was amazing.

Roni went with me and stayed for a couple of days. The first day we were there, we drove to Tucson to visit another cancer fighter, Josh Allen (you can find a link to his blog -- created and updated by his sister-- at the right of my blog). We spent about 4 hours there and had a great time. Having a strong, loving family is an important part of fighting cancer, and Josh certainly has one. We met his wife and kids, his parents and sisters, his mother-in-law, cousin and one of his sister's boyfriend. At once they made us feel at home and when we left, we felt like we were part of the family. Josh was recovering from a round of chemo, so he spent most of the time sleeping.

Please continue to keep him and his family in prayer. His fight isn't over and he needs as many people as possible watching his back.

As for me, I am still have digestive problems. About 6 or so bowel movements a day. Morning are still the hardest, and I have not been getting much sleep. So please keep me in your prayers as well.

Concerning the cancer support group at work, I spoke with the nurse in our HR dept and she thinks it is a great idea. She was on vacation for the past two weeks, so she said she will try to set up a meeting with her, me, a representative from the American Cancer Society and a rep from Time Inc's EAP (Employee Assistance Program). I'll let you all know how it goes.

Well, that is about it for now. I'll try to get some pics from our trip up soon and will let you all know when they are available.

Kevin

P.S. The blog has a new feature. Clicking on the small envelope icon at the bottom of the post allows you to quickly and easily email a link to the post to a friend.

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Six Weeks Post Op

Just a quick update to let everyone know what is going on.

Today is 6 weeks since my surgery. The scar is healing well, but still a little tight. My main problem continues to be waiting for my intestines to start working properly. Some days are better than others, but I still have to make a few more trips to the bathroom than I would like. Unfortunately, this seems to be normal. Others that I have heard from that had ileostomies reversed said it usually takes 2 -3 months for the colon to start doing what it is supposed to do. So I continue to wait....

On another note, I am in the process of finding out how to go about starting a Cancer Support Group at Time Inc. I am not sure how it will all pan out, but I have contacted someone in the Medical Dept of HR and she seems to think it is a great idea. We will probably be meeting this week to discuss it. I also think it is a great idea and hope it works out. As things proceed, I'll keep you posted.

That's all for now,

Kevin